One-of-a-Kind Montana Shops

US 287 north from Helena, Montana, is a little short on signs of human habitation.

Eventually, you come to the Census-designated place called Augusta, pop. 300 or so. Part of its Main Street is US 287, featuring the sort of things you expect in a small-town main street.Augusta, Montana Augusta, Montana Augusta, Montana

A main street in Montana, that is. Augusta, Montana

There are other ideas about what the flag should look like, and considering the wave of new state flags, it might be changed.

Then there was this house stuffed to the gills with stuff, offering that stuff for sale. A lot of stuff. A resale business dealing in stuff, let’s say. No formal name that I could see.

We couldn’t pass that by. The mind boggles at how this accumulation accumulated, and you should boggle your mind every now and then. The place was so jammed that I had to be conscious of every movement, lest I bush into something and cause of an avalanche of stuff.Augusta Montana junk shop Augusta Montana junk shop

Lots of stuff outside, too.Augusta Montana junk shop Augusta Montana junk shop

Say, whatever happened to Lash LaRue?Augusta, Montana

Just curious. I’m not enough of a fan to buy a beat-up $20 comic book, though I bought a few postcards unrelated to LaRue or Westerns or even movies.

In fact, I didn’t know much about LaRue, so I later read one of his obituaries. He died only in 1996, with B Westerns having long passed him by. Even by the early ’70s that was the case, as reflected by the Statler Brothers’ catchy 1973 bug-in-amber song, “Whatever Happened to Randolph Scott?” (Who died in 1987.)

Just west of the western entrance of Glacier NP, on US 2 in the town of Columbia Falls, Montana, is Ten Commandment Park, a.k.a. God’s Ten Commandments Park. I hadn’t read that Roadside America article or heard about it in any way. But I saw it. Couldn’t pass that by either. Not retail, strictly speaking, but there were items for sale inside. Or, I suppose, available for a donation.Ten Commandments Park

The welcome center is along a U-shaped driveway that sports many billboards. Ten Commandments Park Ten Commandments Park Ten Commandments Park

Some exhorted one and all to follow a specific Commandment; others were pro-religious quotes from famed U.S. presidents; and yet others lauded Jesus.

I had to go in.Ten Commandments Park Ten Commandments Park Ten Commandments Park

A fellow of about my age, large and gray bearded, was there to greet me. Frankly I expected a bit more witnessing from him. Instead, he told me to look around, let him know if I wanted to buy anything, and he offered license plate-sized Ten Commandments and Jesus magnets for free. Also, a few free snacks. That was it.

Cucumber Time

Rain early this morning and clouds all day, and fairly warm. In the afternoon, we paid a visit to a warehouse store. In the retail world, Halloween is just around the corner.

As Halloween décor goes, I’ll say they’re impressive, though I’m not in the market for any such ghoulish simulations. Not even the Werewolves of Schaumburg (a lesser-known follow-up to the Werewolves of London?).

They retail for about $200 and $250, though I can’t remember which one was for which price. They’re a bit animatronic. For instance, the werewolf’s jaw opens and closes.

I can’t vouch for the accuracy of this long sentence in the Wiki article about the Silly Season, but I like the term “Cucumber Time,” so I’m quoting it here.

“In many languages, the name for the silly season references cucumbers (more precisely: gherkins or pickled cucumbers). Komkommertijd in Dutch, Danish agurketid, Icelandic gúrkutíð, Norwegian agurktid (a piece of news is called agurknytt or agurknyhet, i.e.,  ‘cucumber news’), Czech okurková sezóna (‘pickle season’), Slovak uhorková sezóna, Polish Sezon ogórkowy, Hungarian uborkaszezon, and Hebrew עונת המלפפונים (onat ha’melafefonim, ‘season of the cucumbers’) all mean ‘cucumber time’ or ‘cucumber season.’ ”

Considering the fraught politics of our time, and the equally fraught – if somewhat more permanent – 24/7 news cycle, and the way people glue themselves to their hand-held boxes, I’m not sure the Silly Season is an active concept any more, whatever you call it. Either there is no such season specific to August any more, or it’s all Silly Season.

No matter, I’m taking a long break for the Silly Season. Once upon a time, I worked for a news organization that didn’t publish during the week before Labor Day, just like the week between Christmas and New Years, and it was a paid week, no less. I thought that was a fine company practice; but it didn’t last.

Back to posting around September 9, assuming I survive the Silly Season, and I’d say the actuaries would still be on my side in that matter. But who knows. The Yellowstone Caldera (say) might blow, ruining everyone’s end-of-summer plans.

Return to Le Roy, Home of Wausaneta

It so happens that Moraine View State Recreation Area is only a few miles north of Le Roy, Illinois, a burg I passed through more than five years ago. At that time I made the acquaintance of Wausaneta, an imaginary Kickapoo chief. His statue has stood in Kiwanis Park in Le Roy for more than a century now, gift to the town of the wealthy crackpot who dreamed him up. I mean, gift to the town of the spiritualist and leading citizen who communed with Wausaneta those many years ago.

As of Sunday, the statue of Wausaneta still stands in Le Roy’s main square.Le Roy, Illinois

I didn’t remember the carved stump tree nearby.Le Roy, Illinois

Panther Tree, it’s called. The local high school mascot is a panther. The reason I don’t remember it is because it wasn’t there until late 2019; I came in March of that year.

While Yuriko dozed in the car, I took a stroll down Main Street, learning that this isn’t the only Le Roy.Main Street, Le Roy, Illinois Main Street, Le Roy, Illinois Main Street, Le Roy, Illinois

Most of the buildings are occupied by one business or another. The former Le Roy State Bank is now the Oak & Flame Bourbon Hall.Main Street, Le Roy, Illinois

Every town worth its salt had an opera house, once upon a time. In this case, that time was 1892.Main Street, Le Roy, Illinois

The Princess Theatre had an abandoned look, but its web site that says that Horizon: An American Saga is playing there once a day until August 3. Only $5 for seniors and children, and $6 for adults, which might be what it’s worth.Main Street, Le Roy, Illinois

“Marcus West, son of Simeon West, built the Princess Theater in 1916,” the web site says. Simeon West was the aforementioned wealthy crackpot.

“Architect Arthur L. Pillsbury designed the brick theater with limestone accents. The first movie was Tennessee’s Pardner on November 21, 1916. The original theater was a silent movie house with piano accompaniment, as talkies did not make their debut in Le Roy until 1931. A grandson of Marcus West recounts that West’s daughter, while in high school, substituted as piano player when the regular player was unable to accompany the film.”

This building looked genuinely empty. Not only empty, but still sporting a Trump-Pence sign, already a relic of yore. It has a future as a hipster bar, maybe.Main Street, Le Roy, Illinois

Guns & Glory. LeRoy Illinois Main Street

Guns & Glory offers firearms, cleaning, repair, concealed carry classes, and Bibles.

“We are probably the only gun shop and religious book store combined that you will find,” its web site says. “We believe we can provide the two most important things to protect you – ‘God and guns.’ ”

Used to be the First National Bank. And a Rexall drug store.LeRoy Illinois Main Street

Someone went to some lengths to blot out the Rexall name, but not enough to efface it completely, if you know what you’re looking at.LeRoy Illinois Main Street

I believe the drug store in Alamo Heights where I bought comics in the early ’70s was a Rexall, but I’m not quite sure. At some moment after I left town, it disappeared. That same dynamic happened so much that the brand now enjoys only a whisper of its ’50s coast-to-coast retail glory.

Boba

Postscript on the tent. I returned it today, and the clerk said I hadn’t been the only one who brought it back for leakage. So I suppose my return is now another data point that the retailer is gathering about the tent. With enough data like that, it might vanish from its shelves sometime, maybe in favor of the brand it used to sell — namely Coleman.

The camping gear is now off display there anyway, as far as I could see, as a seasonal matter. The place is very much attuned to seasonable buying patterns, as any major retailer is going to be. Tents are for spring, as people think about camping.

At least no Christmas stuff yet. That I noticed.

I did notice these boxes.

And these.

Just an indication of the further march of bubble tea (boba) into the awareness and buying habits of the American consumer, and the businesses out to meet that demand. If you can find it in this warehouse store, that puts it firmly in the U.S. mainstream. I haven’t taken to it myself, but my daughters have, enough to spend time at the boba tea houses that have opened up locally over the last decade or so.

Joyba happens to be headquartered in Walnut Creek, California, though the bubble tea itself is a product of Mexico. Nearshoring in action, I reckon.

Boba’s distinctive ingredient is the tapioca pearl, and the drinks come with straws large enough to pull the pearls through. Bet tapioca makers – cassava growers – are happy about the new worldwide popularity of boba.

“Bubble tea is said to have originated in the eighties in the city of Taichung [Taiwan]. Several tea companies claim to be the creator, so it’s unclear which is the true founder of the popular drink,” reported the South China Morning Post.

“A decade later, the addictively tasty drink reached most parts of East and Southeast Asia with bubble tea shops popping up in every mall and street corner. Since then, it has spread across the globe, including the US, Australia, Europe and South Africa.”

Portuguese Mix

Early last year, I ordered a number of 4″ x 6″ tabletop flags from an online vendor that doesn’t happen to be Amazon. I have pocket change and postcards and tourist spoons and all kinds of bric-a-brac from the places I’ve been, so why not flags? One for each nation I’ve visited.

So I ordered a Portuguese flag last week, to add to the collection. While Macao was still administrated by Portugal when I visited in 1990, it was too much of a stretch to say I’d been to Portugal, until last month.

Something I never noticed on the flag – behind the shield of Portugal, which has a lore of its own – is an armillary sphere, a model of objects in the sky. A navigators’ tool, among other things, which fits Portuguese history nicely. A cool design element.

We saw other representations of the globe — terrestrial or celestial — at Pena Palace in Sintra.

This one at Jerónimos Monastery.

For sale at the Cod Museum, canned fish. At fancy prices.

For sale at a Portuguese grocery store, canned fish. At everyday prices.

In case you didn’t buy enough canned fish in the city, at the airport there’s a branch of Mundo Fantástico Da Sardinha Portuguesa, a sardine store on the Praça do Rossio.

For once, the Google Maps description is accurate: “Souvenir shop showcasing fancy tins of Portuguese sardines in a wacky, circuslike atmosphere.” You can even sit on a sardine throne.Mundo Fantástico Da Sardinha Portuguesa

The “Beer Museum” off Praça do Comércio seemed more like a restaurant and bar, but anyway you have to have a beer at a place like that, and I did. A Portuguese brew whose name I was too much on vacation to remember.Portuguese beer

I wasn’t awed by the beer, which was good enough, but I was awed by this display. That’s one artful wall of beer.Portuguese beer

We didn’t make it to the castle overlooking Lisbon (Castelo de São Jorge), so I can’t comment on the view from there. I will say that the roof of our hotel offered a pretty good one.Lisbon vista

Looking up at the city is another kind of vista. There’s a ferry port (and subway station) on the Tagus near Praça do Comércio. Step outside there, and some of the city is visible. The stone tower is part of Lisbon Cathedral.Lisbon vista

We emerged from the subway one morning and spotted this.

Monumento aos Mortos da Grande Guerra. I had to check, and found out that about 12,000 Portuguese soldiers died in WWI, including in France but also fighting the Germans in Africa. The memorial is on Av. Da Liberdade.

Europe, in my experience, is pretty good at putting together leafy boulevards.

That’s a tall order for a sandwich shop. We didn’t investigate the claim, either the number of steps, nor the state of mind.

At Basílica de Nossa Senhora dos Mártires, we encountered this fellow.

Rather Roman looking, and I mean the ancient Roman army, not “prays like a Roman with her eyes on fire.” At first I thought he might be Cornelius the Centurion, but the key clue is HODIE (“today”) written on the cross, meaning he’s Expeditus. I don’t ever remember seeing him depicted in a church. The patron of urgent causes, among other things.

We saw a flamenco show in Barcelona last year, but no fado in Lisbon. We did see a fado truck, however.FADO TRUCK, LISBON

We ate at the Time Out Market Lisboa twice.Time Out Lisboa Time Out Lisboa

There was a reason it was crowded. Everything was a little expensive, but really good. Such as this place, whose grub was like Shake Shack.Time Out Lisboa Time Out Lisboa

The last meal of the trip wasn’t at Time Out Lisboa, but a Vietnamese restaurant with room enough for about 20 people. It too was full.

Spotted at one of the subway stations we passed through more than once. Alice in Wonderland‘s fans are international in scope.Lisbon subway rabbit

On the whole, the Lisbon subways are efficient and inexpensive, and the lines go a lot of places. Even so, elevator maintenance did seem to be an issue. There were times when our tired feet would have appreciated an elevator, but no go.

Scenes from Parc Eduardo VII, which includes green space and gardens but also elegant buildings.Edward VII Park, Lisbon Edward VII Park, Lisbon Edward VII Park, Lisbon

There was an event there that day, at least according to those blue signs, that had something to do with the Portuguese Space Agency. I didn’t know there was such a thing. I’d have assumed Portugal would participate in the ESA, and leave it at that. But no, the Agência Espacial Portuguesa was founded in 2019, and is looking to create a space port in the Azores.

We didn’t investigate the event any further, but we did look at the tiles on the building. Nice.Edward VII Park, Lisbon Edward VII Park, Lisbon

Among the kings of Portugal, there was no Edward VII – only one Edward, who reigned from 1433 to 1438 – so when I saw it on the map, I figured it was for the British monarch of that regnal name. Yes, according to Wiki: “The park is named for King Edward VII of the United Kingdom, who visited Portugal in 1903 to strengthen relations between the two countries and reaffirm the Anglo-Portuguese Alliance.”

Lisbon manhole covers. Maybe not as artful as some of the other street details on Lisbon, but not bad.Lisbon manhole cover Lisbon manhole cover Lisbon manhole cover

I saw S.L.A.T. a fair amount. Later, I looked it up: Sinalização Luminosa Automática de Trânsito – Automatic Traffic Light Signaling.

Down in Belém, On the Shores of the Tagus

Even as the longest river on the Iberian Peninsula, the Tagus doesn’t come with much in the way of associations, at least in the English-speaking world, unlike the Thames or the Rhine or the Danube or even the Vistula or the quiet-flowing Don.

Still, when the River Tagus reaches Lisbon, and reaches the ocean, it has an impressive width. But there’s more to it than that. This was a disembarkation point for the wider world for the seafaring Portuguese, and did they ever disembark.Tagus River, Lisbon

The view is from the Belém district of Lisbon, at the western edge of the city. The Metro doesn’t go out that way; the mass transit option is a streetcar (tram), which we took early in the afternoon of May 15, riding out first to see Belém Tower (Torre de Belém).Belem Tower Belem Tower Belem Tower

A sturdy relic of the time when Portugal was out remaking the world, and from a time (the 16th century) when stone fortresses offered some protection against invasion by sea. An impressive work, and impressively popular.Belem Tower

So popular that we decided to take a stroll by the river rather than wait in that line.

Vendors set up shop near the tower, even if that only meant putting down a rug and one’s wares. If I’d been in the market for a hat, I might have bought one from her. The sun that might have inspired business for her was mostly behind clouds that day.Near Belem Tower

Other, more formally organized vendors, had vehicles or carts.Near Belem Tower Near Belem Tower Near Belem Tower

A few minutes’ walk east of the tower is the Monument of the Discoveries (Padrão dos Descobrimentos), which is a lot newer than the tower. In fact I’m almost as old as the monument, which was erected in 1960. So more a relic of the Salazar dictatorship than the far-flung Portuguese maritime empire. Still, as concrete (and rose-color stone) goes, it’s an impressive bit of work.Discoveries Discoveries Discoveries

Two rows of Portuguese notables from the Age of Discovery line either side of the monument, including some well-known figures, such as Afonso de Albuquerque, Bartolomeu Dias, Francis Xavier, Vasco da Gama, Ferdinand Magellan and Pedro Alvares Cabral. Others I had to look up: Pedro Nunes, for instance, a mathematician who worked on navigation, and who sounds like he ought to be better known outside the world of mathematics.

Who leads the line of statues looking out to sea? At 26 feet tall, Prince Henry the Navigator, of course.

Knickknacks, An Expatriate Scotsman & St. Anthony of Padua – Rather, Lisbon

Souvenir shops usually don’t make much of an impression, though there are exceptions, such as Bronner’s Christmas Wonderland in Frankenmuth, Michigan.

Another exception: the small shop facing the small plaza just downhill from the Sé de Lisboa and in front of the Church of Saint Anthony of Lisbon (Igreja de Santo António de Lisboa). The place, Gaivota Citadina, was wild with tiles and other high-quality souvenirs.Gaivota Citadina Gaivota Citadina Gaivota Citadina

Look carefully, and you’ll see cork in the pictures, too. Cork souvenirs come in the form of coaster bottoms, but also wallets, bags, neckties and more, though not all of those were at this shop. Cork, incidentally, lines the backs of seats in the Metro cars. If you go to Portugal, you will see cork.

As far as tourist souvenirs goes – the knickknacks offered in countless small shops worldwide that exist to sell just such knickknacks – many Lisbon stores rate highly, carrying an unusually distinctive and good-looking stocks of items. Tiles and cork, but much more than that. Best of all, many of them still sell postcards, often for 50 euro cents each, and not just the usual pictures of the absolute most famous sites. Interesting postcards at popular prices: something we can all get behind.

While Yuriko and Ann were poring over tiles at Gaivota Citadina, and I’d already picked out a selection of cards, I had a short chat with an English-speaking fellow who seemed to know the proprietor, or at least the people running the shop that day. A Scotsman, he turned out to be a resident of Lisbon. I asked him how long.

“On and off for about five years now. I came on holiday once and just stayed.”

As if anticipating a next question, he then told me that other parts of Europe aren’t as pleasant or hospitable as Portugal these days.

“France, Germany, those places are on fire,” he told me. “Literally in the case of France. It isn’t like that in Portugal.”

Actually, he was wrong about literal wildfire; Portugal has suffered some recently. Regardless, though he didn’t quite put it this way, he said that the Portuguese have an underappreciated talent for living well. And leaving well enough alone.

Could be. I’d only been there a day at that point, and had (and have) no way to assess his feelings on Portugal. But he did seem enthusiastic about the country even after five years.

Later, I parked myself on the plaza’s only bench and watched people throw coins at a statue of St. Anthony. The goal seemed to be to land the coins on a flat part of the statue. The saint’s open book, as it turns out. Tradition, according to the museum behind the statue.

That was hard, but this fellow in red (not the Scotsman, someone else) was able to do it.Church of Saint Anthony of Lisbon Church of Saint Anthony of Lisbon

The baroque church itself – a replacement for the one destroyed in 1755 – rises where St. Anthony was said to be born, as Fernando de Bulhões, in 1195.Church of Saint Anthony of Lisbon Church of Saint Anthony of Lisbon

In Lisbon, he isn’t Anthony of Padua, since they claim the popular saint as their own. Anthony of Lisbon, and don’t you forget it.

Ollie Warhol

Today was about as raw an April day as I can remember, with more cold rain and snappy winds to come tomorrow. This year it’s as if early February traded places with early April, though not quite. At least the snow melted.

With a digital camera, anyone can create Warhol-like images.

When Andy Warhol died in 1987, he was already playing with computerized images. What if he’d lived long enough to create web sites? What would he have done with social media?

All that occurred to me at the catch-as-catch-can retailer Ollie’s, though the thought could have been inspired by many retailers.

The last time I was there, more politically inspired dog toys had turned up.

I was tempted to acquire Slick Willie to go with Bernie. But no. Not because we don’t have a dog any more. She would have chewed such toys to bits, so it wouldn’t have been for her, but just a whimsy of mine. But I have enough useless items. Not, however, enough useless images, which take up a lot less physical space.

The Odds

A random thought today: Do the Irish bookies take bets on when and which company will be indicted next for antitrust violations? One table of odds for the U.S. and a different one for the European Union?

Not sure why I thought of that. Just one of those passing notions.

Somehow the Bernie Bros Missed This One

A few weeks ago, I went again to Ollie’s, whose appeal is the randomness of its merchandise, and there he was, among the packaged foods and housewares and small appliances and furniture and bric-a-brac, no other stuffed politicos around, no tag or bar code.

“This the funniest thing I’ve seen all day,” I said to the clerk. “How much?”

I was only kidding. It was the funniest thing I’d seen all week, maybe all month. He spent a minute or so tapping into a laptop near the register, but soon gave up the chase. “How about $3.99?” he said.

Sold.

A product of Fuzzu, a Vermont designer of pet toys. I’d say maker, but for Bernie at least that occurred in China. Bernie isn’t alone — well, he was when I found him, but had he been separated, a la Toy Story, from the rest of the Fuzzu stable? Joe, Kamala, Donald, Mike, Hillary, Bill and Rootin’ Tootin’ Putin.

Mike? The former Mayor Bloomberg, it seems, since on his back is “Pop Cop.”

Now Bernie joins my small collection of presidential ephemera: postcards, a few buttons, my Franklin Pierce bobblehead and William Henry Harrison Pez dispenser and Eugene V. Debs ribbon. My definition of presidential is pretty broad, and certainly includes serious if quixotic candidates for the nomination.